??....Random?

Wondering what am I to you now. I'm confused, and even I don't even know how to face it well. I wonder when i broke up with you, some of my ex find me back...... and new people that want to chase me ....even they didn't see me in real before, and there is one special now..... but I'm not that ready.... afraid that I might use this feel just to replace the missing feel when I'm with you. What is special in me? Why people like me where you just used me?.... I keep confusing myself... YOU ARE GONE... .... forever..? or temporary?....seconds ago? or years apart?.....There are times where I said to myself....Pingu.... Pingu.... where are you now? How are you?............................then I just knock off my mind thinking that PINGU HAD GONE! PLEASE DON'T THINK OF IT ANYMORE!
Hurtful moment when my mind against my emotional.....

Two papers failed, ES1 and Math 2, as I get my result and it does not effect any of my feelings. I just felt hurt when I think of you and your voice is like a poison to my emotional... I remember you keep asking..."Cant you just skip today class...just to accompany me....I needed you", yeah I wish to,... but then what do I pay for? skipping class or educational.....I know you do not need to study... no need to go college as you so easily give up on your studies... but you didn't think about me.....maybe you really need me.....and I KNOW THAT FEELING IS JUST TEMPORARY TILL THERE SOMEONE THERE HUGGING YOU AND DO WHATEVER THING YOU ALWAYS DO....this is what I though of.. to avoid letting myself to see you ...but sadly it just kills my mood to study when I'm in class.